A common trope/annoyance/trend in YA is the lack of parents or really, the lack of
good parents. They may be dead or out of the picture or even the antagonist. It's very rare to find a nice parent relationship. Not so ironically,
tomorrow is my mother's
I won't say birthday. While I could show some great examples my mom has done throughout my life (as well as my dad since this can be an early hurrah for his January birthday as well), I thought it would be more fun to give parenting advice courtesy of some YA books I've read.
If anybody has read A Long, Long Sleep, you'll know that this is probably the worst set of parents ever. I don't know if I can say too much because it might be considered a spoiler even though you'd be blind to not realize it. First of all, they stassed their child. Stassing is basically putting them in a coma for however long you want to. And they wanted to a lot. You find more horrific things about them as you read.
Be careful of the bratty woes that money may bring.
He could also be considered the antagonist in this story, but anyone can know that after reading the title. He ignores his daughter, is cold, calculating, and doesn't deserve the title "father" one iota in the majority of the book. By doing this, his daughter was raised to be self-centered with a twisted view of life and love. Mr. Larabee is the poster child for how to screw your kid up with money.
Don't Dessen your daughter.
In her stories, the parents are a big part of the conflict in the book. Whether it's a deadbeat mother, an absent father, a misunderstanding between the teenager and the parent, or something else; the parent plays a role, but man, they do a nice job in messing up their kid's life.
Draw a line between parenting and controlling.
Once again, an antagonist parent. She supposedly means well throughout the series, but the conflict is always the same. She overworks her daughter, acts more like a controlling manager instead of a mother, and her daughter makes excuses for her. Her desire was to make her kids famous, but that was mostly so
she could be famous and filthy rich. How to Let Your Child Go 101 is the class for her.
We never really met him in the series, but he forced his children to do things they didn't want to do. This wasn't "do your chores" kind of thing. This was "I'm making you go down this career path." Also, I subtract parenting points for being an absentee father. I think Thom needed a better male figure in his life.
Be there for your child during the hard times.
To her credit, she did improve...and then sank again. When Katniss's father died, she left her two young daughters to their own defenses, widening a gap between her and Katniss. There was definite improvement, I thought, in the second book when Katniss started forgiving her. Then trauma happened and...well...you want to be mad at her, but you want to hug her as well.
Money can also distance your relationship.
We don't know much about Hale's parents and only receive a peek into their lives in the third book. They're another set of rich parents who don't really care about their son. If someone would just give
me lots of money when I reach the parenting stage
or I can take it earlier, I would set a great example of how parenting can be done when wealthy.
So if you aren't doing any of these things, you're on the right path to being a good parent! Fortunately, I'm not in a YA novel and my parents haven't messed me up. I thank you both. Happy Birthday, Mom!
What are some other YA bad parenting mistakes that you've noticed?
